A familiar place is limbo.

Like an old friend, greeted

so warmly in a tight embrace.

Held firmly for a moment

too long, this friendship turns sinister.

Paralysed in a constant unescapable

nightmare. Lingering on a knifes

edge, testing my endurance. Unprepared

a sudden onset tears at the fragile

seams holding me together.

Living under the bell jar, life

unfulfilling and temporary.

These thoughts echo in my mind

floating in the foreground. Unbelievably

hard to ignore.

Riddled with boredom I’m an expressionless

machine on repeat, fighting

to find a distraction. Void of all emotion

and severely lacking personality I squander my time

chasing happiness to dead ends.

Yet time slows, grinding to a halt. Relentless

in its mocking, unable to skip.

In light bound by a numb pain, hiding

the shattered me in the safety of darkness.

Trapped in a loop of my own mortality.

Suffocating on life. Oxygen

turned enemy, it deliberately poisons my mind.

Suffering in silence, disease spreads

with an iron grip, seeping into every nerve.

Dead inside.

Depression! A word lost in a sea

of false screams. Disregarded and each day dragging

me closer to that final destination.

To surrender would be easy when

dying is the only option.